she's a rebel

2006-08-03T19:49:00.000-07:00

Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes take the apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. The apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

On the other hand, men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

God, who wants to help me stomp the shit out of my guy?

2006-08-02T21:32:00.000-07:00

I got the shit kicked out of me by love.

Mmm I miss you like hell, and you don't even know it. You probably don't care, either.

2006-07-18T13:41:00.000-07:00

FOR FARAH (and really whoever else wants to know):

Well, you know how in Singapore the guy will just ask you if you want to be his or her girlfriend or not? And then you guys start dating exclusively (i.e. steady)? It's completely different here in Canada. Which makes things more complicated for me.

Here, you guys tell each other that you like each other, and you go out on dates, but you aren't exactly girlfriend/boyfriend yet. You're just...um...dating. And after a loooong while, after you've gone through a lot of dates and all that, you might get considered boyfriend/girlfriend. It's really just a matter of time and all that.

But I like to think of him as my not-really-but-kinda-is-boyfriend because, well, I like him and he likes me and this is how it's supposed to go. But it's a shame we haven't talked in a while. I'm too shy to call him. =X

And I hope you are doing ok, Farah, coz I really miss you and I wouldn't want any harm done to you by ANYONE. =) MISS YOUUUUUUUUU!!

2006-07-16T19:34:00.000-07:00

It's been about 2 weeks and he hasn't called yet.

Mmmm...hear me out, I'm really really annoyed that I'm this into you. But, would it kill you to pick up the phone and call me?

HELP ME FIND A JOB, EVERYONE.

2006-07-04T19:25:00.000-07:00

GUESS WHO'S GOT A BOYFRIEND?

2006-06-20T18:59:00.000-07:00

this shiny summer,
she'll bring me lots of fun,
i'll have a party next week,
but there'll be no rum.
i'll invite your friends,
and i'll give you a call.
you'll bring the love,
and the soccer ball.

to farah:
i'm 'dating' the boy i've liked for a while now. i asked him out a couple of weeks ago and he said yes. he asked for my number, and i asked for his. however, we've been to busy to actually call each other, with exams and all. but next week is the start of the summer holidays. i've got a party planned so woot!

unfortunately though? no booze. my dad put a ban on it.

WTF.

2006-06-10T10:06:00.000-07:00

So I'm dating.

=)

2006-05-18T15:00:00.000-07:00

peter: blahblahblahblahblahblondegirlblahblahblah
jay: So, Peter, what would you do if a hot girl tells you she has a crush on you?
anthony: *rudely interrupts* Well, I'd ask her out!
jay: *perplexed and shocked* So why don't you do that now? (refering to me)
anthony: *looks away & laughs nervously* er...
anthony: *turns red*

-_-"

2006-05-01T17:05:00.000-07:00

Have you ever missed crushing on someone, and not the actual crush?

Well, granted, I think I'm getting over Anthony, but I really really don't want to. I still think he's pretty cute and all, but I don't like him as much as I used to, and I don't like that part one bit. Hm.

Everyone else thinks I'm over him, but I'm not. Almost over him, but not totally over him. Bleagh. God, he's such a nerd. And I find that part so endearing. =/

MY RANT MAKES NO SENSE AHHH!

God, even my relationship with Iskandar was easier than this. XD (Hey, if you're reading. THANKS!)

2006-04-21T16:30:00.000-07:00

Today was funny. During our PLC (study hall, kinda), Camp Olympia students from our school were filming video spoofs of Kill Bill, Harry Potter, etc. I didn't really give much of a shit, until the filming site was suddenly a few metres away from me. The camera dude called "Harry", "Ron" and "Hermione". I didn't notice them at first. They definitely had the parts. Hermione had bushy brown hair. Ron had red hair...although it was an afro (Will Foster...rawr) and Harry Potter definitely looked somewhat like Harry Potter. Until I realized that the guy in the Harry Potter get-up was actually Anthony. SPECS AND EVERYTHING! It was so adorable.

But before all of that happened, something pretty stupid occured. He and I were talking on MSN. He hardly seemed interested, and I always brought up the topics. Then suddenly he changes his display picture to a picture of him and a girl hugging. I know that girl has another boyfriend though, and that they're just friends...but it kinda shows you what he's trying to say. =/

I dunno what to believe.

He still stares at me a whole lot, though. (It was definitely caught on the 'Harry Potter Spoof' video. I HAVE EVIDENCE!)

So yeah. Dang, right?

2006-04-05T16:19:00.000-07:00

To Karen.

Well, not only really in US. Most of North America's pretty shitty. I mean, yeah, ok, good economics and whatever, but honestly, after living here for quite some time, I'd prefer being back in singapore.

reason #1.
Tax is pretty high. PRETTY HIGH. (15% for us Torontonians)

reason #2.
I hate the 4 seasons. I know you're gonna say, "But snow! So nice!" YEAHHH BULLSHIT. It's not. You'll get sick of it.

reason #3.
North America has a lot of problems compared to singapore. Especially in schools. Last friday, the school near to mine had some commotion. Apparently this guy walks into the school and stabs two people and runs ( so we had to lock our school for safety reason)...just because he thinks they took his wallet. And, er, this is Toronto. Imagine US...where there are actually metal detectors to go through?

i dunno, you should really just think about it really really well. North America isn't at all like what you see in TV. It's not "the land of milk and honey" when all the honey is gone and the milk is sour.

just my advice.

2006-04-04T15:22:00.000-07:00

Hey. So long no blog.

What's happning in my (love) life?

Nothing.

Just a lot of stares (that aren't from me), akward hellos and red faces. I honestly think he likes me. I wish I knew it for certain.

=)

Don't worry I'll ask him out soon.

2006-03-12T08:25:00.000-08:00

My life is made for TV Drama.

Acoustica came and went, and even though he said he would come, he didn't. I was pissed for half a day at him and I tried to avoid him so I didn't have to deal with the awkwardness. I even came to math class late, even though I'm always early for that. (He sits behind me in math. OMGZ)

Anyway. So I come in late for math class on Friday, and I see him sitting on my table looking at me. I approach. He gets up and sits on his own seat. I put my bag down and take out my math book and he starts talking. I haven't said a word yet.

He said he was going to Acoustica, but Patrick's (he motions to the guy in front of me) mom pulled out an extra curling practice (I swear that woman ruins everyone's love lives) so he couldn't go. He apologised and I smiled and said it was ok. Patrick looked as us for a moment and said, "Oh my god, Anthony. That's not how you apologise. Get on your knees! Buy her lunch! Katrina, you should yell at him. Seriously."

And then Anthony said, "Well it's you're fault I couldn't come."

"What? Why?"

"Your mom made us practice."

Then they argue about that for five minutes. Monica noticed it and smiled at me and I laughed.

I started chatting with him more about the tests and yeah. So I talked to him more than usual. XD

Mmm come fourth period, then.

I meet Stephanie in front of class and I see Anthony looking at me. (!!!) I couldn't pay attention to him though because Stephy kept going on and on about Cody aka guy-who-killed-his-primary-red-mohawk and I just listened and listened. Jay came and started talking to him. (Later on Jay told me that he looked like he wanted to talk to me. He was looking at me, and he was stepping forward then backward again)

Then the bell rings and we go into class and I sit down. He sits down and looks at me. Stares. Burns a hole through me. OPENLY.

Then my teacher decides to seat me right across from him during our make-up test. I think I got a 0 on that test. But anyway, at one point we were shoulder to shoulder when getting our tests. Eep!

Then when school was over, I was about to tell him to have a good break...but I didn't. Because I'm an idiot.

I think I have a chance now. =)

2006-03-08T16:43:00.000-08:00

WAHOO tomorrow's Acoustica. I asked him to come and he said he would. yay? yay.

2006-02-21T14:15:00.000-08:00

EEE.

He's so adorable.

During Math he was talking to Patrick about his plans for University. He said he wanted to take something that had to do with math and science. Patrick suggested Engineering, and he was like, "Yeah. That sounds right."

And internally, I was like, "Holy shit my dad would so love you."

My dad has a degree in Engineering. He is hella proud that my brother is going for his Bachelor's in Science next year. And he told me once that if I ever had a boyfriend that I'd like to bring home, he better be an Engineer.

Lol it's just hilarious how this works out.

An aaww here comes the adorable part. He held the door for me. Even though I was pretty far away from the door. But he still waited. That is so sweet. And also, while I was talking to my friends and he was walking away, he was looking at me which made me go *SQUEE* inside.

Gah. He is so adorable.

2006-02-20T19:07:00.000-08:00

SHIIIIT.

Course Selection Week. Senior year next...what am I taking?

1. English 12 (U)
2. English Literature (U)
3. Writer's Craft (U)
4. Visual Art 12 (U/C)
5. Physics 12 (U)
6. Philosophy (U/C)
7. Calculus or Geometry (U)
8. Photography (U/C)

(That's right...THREE english courses, and PHYSICS.)

Yeah...I only actually need ONE english. York University's Bachelor of Fine Arts only requires English and Visual Art. Er--so I have freedom to pick any other course I want.

Unfortunately, like my asshole of a Physics teacher said, "Freedom is the hardest thing any human being can handle."

Then why do we always seek for it?

Anyway, I'm taking 3 English courses because a.) I'm pretty darn good at English, b.) if the Arts thing doesn't work out, I'll switch my major to English. Or if i'm done with the Arts, and if still interested, I'd go major in English after I get my Arts Degree. It's just an option I wanna keep open.

Photography, i hope, will influence my art and perspective.

And as for Physics/Philosophy/Geometry/Calculus? I just want to sound like a smartass.

And make my life harder. =)

2006-02-10T18:30:00.000-08:00

AAHHHH.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

So he stares at me a lot. I think he likes me, but I'm not sure. I want to know, but I think I screwed it up. My friend talked to him, and he was like, "No comment. I know you're gonna tell her anyway."

(then my friend says "she's crazy about you". and i think i'm about dead.)

I don't fucking understand what that was about but whatever.

Then i find out my other good friend likes him too and I just want to die right there. Everyone thinks he likes me but honestly I can't be so sure.

(He likes asians though. =])

2006-01-31T09:58:00.000-08:00

I feel quite stupid today.

I went to school for my Religion exam and I went to the cafeteria first by myself to study. That was a stupid idea. I walked in, there was this large group of Grade 11s sitting by the door, hanging out (possibly studying? who knows.), and he was the first person to see me come in. The rest of the cafeteria was empty, and people were looking at me sit down by myself to study. It's not that I feel uncomfortable being alone (I like being alone sometimes), but it's the fact he was there to stare at me and make me feel like an idiot.

Well, let's hope he won't be in my classes next semester, so I can get over my crush already. =)

2006-01-30T10:17:00.000-08:00

Hi everyone.

As you can probably see, I changed the skin. I'm not a wiz at codes, so this might end up looking like shit in other people's screens. Best that you view this in Mozilla Firefox.

Isn't all clean and sparkly?

2006-01-28T20:51:00.000-08:00

--so I says to meself: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?

That dream was stupid and, quite frankly, very similar to every teen movie that has ever been made. And yet all I can think about is: WHY DID I WAKE UP BEFORE THE GIRL GETS THE GUY?

I can't remember much of the dream, much less the details, but read along anyway. I'm sure you'll find it an interesting read. (hey, you made it this far...you wouldn't be here unless you want to read about my pathetic life and beyond)

So basically, I am in my school cafeteria. Usually, for the lunch hour I sit somewhere quieter so I can enjoy lunch--and my friends' company--at peace. But anyhow, I am in the cafeteria. I am sitting, talking to my friends. On the other table sits this big obnoxious guy I know named Petrit. And with him was a whole gang of his white posse and that guy that I like.

They are talking about how HE has to get with a girl already. HE, apparently, doesn't seem to have interest in dating, although there are many running after him. (*cough*me*cough*) And then, Petrit stands up and announces to the crowd about HIS current situation. He says, "So, isn't there ANY girl in here that would want to date this fine young man?"

And he turns to HIM and asks him, "Don't you know anyone who has the hots for you?"

HE stands up and looks at me. By this point I'm already standing up anyway, and I do not seem to be ashamed of the current revelation. However, by this time, a second girl stands up. She is obviously way prettier than I am, what with her pretty blonde hair and all.

And then Petrit asks, "Who do you choose?"

He stares at me first, but points to the other girl. I am dissapointed, but I look away, smiling. I grab my friend's elbow and we walk out of the cafeteria. As I walk out the door, I hear a "Wait!" but by that time I am awoken by the sudden urge to pee.

....

Again, I say, wtf is that? It's really, wow.

In other news, I will be taking Fashion in school!

(Also, I miss chatting with my bffs--YS, Lincoln, Isk + Farah)

2006-01-20T16:59:00.000-08:00

sdfghjkl

I got Yan Shan's letter. Which was two months late, by the freaking way. She gave me pictures of prom night.

I miss my singaporean friends. I do, I really do. I want ALL of them to come to Canada at one point in their life so that I can show them what I've got established here.

I'm leading a pretty sweet life, if I say so myself. (Except for the money problems? Sweet.)

2006-01-10T18:19:00.000-08:00

Aiyaaaah. By request from Farah and Karen, I have come to update.

Mmmmm let's see what to update on. Oh, I got something. Ok, in my crew, I'm probably the only plain-jane there. Haha. See, this one J-rocker, got nice nice hair. Then this other one, just cut faux-hawk yesterday. Me? The only thing secial about my hair is that it's long, it's blue-black and it's straighter than Paris Hilton. I am, however, in no way will be cutting my hair until I am satisfied that it is REALLY long and that I bear a resemblance to Mitsuko Souma of Battle Royale because I'm a crazy bitch like her and my hair is crazy straight like that. ^^ (It is also my ambition to be in a slasher movie like that. I'm that crazy bitch who tries to kill half of the cast, but I get killed by the more EVIL guy anyway. hmph. i don't mind having that little curved sword thingimajig of hers, too.)

I'm halfway there, only need two more months to get it THAT long. Hehe. But my friend, the one with faux hawk hair, said she'll help me dye the bottom half of my hair red, so I'll still look like I belong to the crazy hair group. Honestly, I couldn't care less. I'm only jealous because people will recognize her easier than they will recognize me. =/

Also, hopefully, by the end of this month, I'll be getting new glasses. My friend, the one with the faux hawk, let me try on her non perscription emo glasses. And I must admit, it looks cute. ^^ Hopefully lah, but last year they (parents) also say the same thing. =(

Anyway, school is ok. We actually watched "Battle Royale", yes, that go-to-this-island-and-kill-the-rest-of-your-classmates-or-be-killed (because all of you are scum) movie for English class. There was bloody, slicing of limbs, heads, down the middle of the torso, explosions, running, vomitting out your intestines, hanging yourself from a rope, being stabbed in the pee-pee, throwing yourself off the island gore and yet it was shown in a Catholic School. As you can very well tell from this paragraph, my teacher is the best teacher in the whole wide world. ^^ The fact that she's white, and she's heard of "Battle Royale" impresses me. But there's a downside. I have to write an essay on that that compares it to the savageness of Lord of the Flies. Ah well, it's in the bag. Really easy, both just show how it is in the human nature to have the strong will to survive by any means. I.e. killing.

Anyway, now that I've bored you enough with my stuff, I leave you off with one note. I'm performing in Acoustica next thursday in school. BOO. It won't be fun, I assure you. Me signing up for this thing is such a wonder to me. Why'd I do it?

Whatever, i'll get my faux hawk friend to take pictures, hopefully. =)

2005-12-30T17:15:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year *throws confetti, blows a party trumpet* to every motherfucker who comes across my blog.

(especially if your name is Farah or Karen.)

;)

2005-11-26T07:47:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow, I will be seventeen.

Birthday Wishlist?
a.) new specsss.
b.) that $125 jacket I saw in Parkway. Lol. PARKWAY WTF?
c.) a true friendship with him.

P.S. Boots would be nice, too. Lol.

2005-11-24T15:02:00.000-08:00

I'm letting go and jumping in.

I like you but I'm forgetting that. I'm only here to find out who you are.

But you're still adorable. =) I fucking love you.

BIRTHDAY IN THREE DAYS, BITCHES!!!

2005-11-04T13:44:00.000-08:00

Hiiii....

(yes'm, i'm high like right now.)

Mmm..k, i should start.

I was waiting for Jodie at her Math class today before lunch. He goes to his locker, dumps his shit in, and walks past me. I had a sudden urge to talk to him, so I did.

Here goes the conversation.

me: Hi, can I talk to you?
him: Uh, yeah.
me: I know Will told you about me.
him: Yeah.
me: So...sorry.
him: about?
me: Making you feel uncomfortable.
him: (grinnin) Oh no, not at all, don't worry about it.
me: Ok. See, it's true. But, I don't know you. But I'd really would like to be friends with you. So..can we be friends?
him: Of course, yes. Definitely.
me: Ok then. Good.
him: Yeah, good.
me: Bye, then!
him: (shyly) Bye, Katrina.

FUUUCK YEAHHH!!!!!

gjkfljghdsklf

I feel so good right now. REALLY GOOD. He's so fucking nice, I swear. Like other boys would say, "Ok, whatever" but he said yes. And he smiles, and I feel happy, and he said my name, and i feel happier.

He's cute as hell. =)

;gs'fxcvkjhdgdsfgkcx'

2005-11-02T14:50:00.000-08:00

"Who's Katrina?"

"She doesn't even know me."

That was his replies when he found out that I liked him. =|

ASDFGHJKL;

I'm actually not surprised, I kinda knew this was going to happen, but idk, I wish he didn't say the first sentence.

It's ok, I'll deal, it was just a crush anyway. And please, don't tell me, "Oh, he's scum, you'll do better!" or "But it's true! You will!" because I'm not in the mood to hear that.

ARGGGH.

Why is it that the boys you like never likes you, and the boys you want least attention from likes you?

It's ok, i'll be over it by Friday. Haha.

2005-10-15T10:43:00.000-07:00

Farah asked me to update.

So, here.

Yesterday Soon Gun, Lyn, Jay and I went to Fairview. The original plan actually was to go with Stephanie and the rest to Pacific Mall, but for some reason, Soon because stupid and went to Fairview. So we went there, and he was late, and, basically, it was too late to go to Pacific Mall.

Stephanie was pissed, sick, but still happy. She didn't go though...bleargh.

Oh well. I'll go with Kristina and Stephanie instead.

2005-09-30T07:40:00.000-07:00

My Uncle Mario is dead. =(

R.I.P.

2005-09-25T15:17:00.000-07:00

I hate my job.

Therefore I'm going to quit when I get a better job at Value Village which will be, hopefully, in a couple of weeks from now.

Seriously, the stuff we do, is ok for two people. But just for one? It can kill me. =(

What do I have to do? Hopefully I can remember.

1. Open the store. I couldn't even turn the bloody key to open the damn gates.
2. Uncover all the toppings
3. Turn the proofer on and put the batter in
4. Turn on the oven so that you can pre-heat it
5. Cut the toppings
6. Clean the slicer (i got cut. and i have like this crazy phobia of knives, and the fact that i'm even cleaning the slicer is something to be proud of)
7. Put the bread in the oven
8. Bake until ready after 20 minutes
9. Put on shelves to cool
10. Put some loaves on display
11. Bag some loaves
12. take orders
13. punch orders in the cash register
14. wash your hands
15. make the bloody sandwhich
16. repeat steps 12-15 until closing
17. if you have time, cut tomatoes, peppers, onions.
18. fill up the toppings
19. count the money
20. sweep the floors
21. mop the floors
22. wash the untensils
23. take out the trash
24. count the bread left over
25. call jim--the manager--and ask how much bread is needed to bake for the next day
26. go to the freezer and put bread in
27. take out batter
28. do shit to it and count
30. collect meats from the freezer.
32. push bread shelf to the back
33. lock up the register
34. close the gates
35. lock the door
36. get the fuck out.

OK ALL THAT FOR ONE PERSON OMG I'M GOING TO DIE. It's just me, nobody else in the whole store but me.

if i got the other job, all I have to do is
1. cashier
2. pick up fallen clothes
3. pick up donation
4. pick up fallen clothes in the fitting room
5. put clothes on the racks
6. price them
7. go through that cycle till closing
8. count the money
9. lock up

and that? is with five other people. And guess what? If I worked at Value Village, I'LL GET EVEN MORE MONEY WTF.

The cons for VV is that it's far, and training is on weekdays. That's FINE JUST DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE BECAUSE I'LL FUCK IT ALL UP!!!

2005-09-23T17:07:00.000-07:00

Bitches, I got a job.

I work weekends, Friday and on occassions, Monday.

Where do I work? Mr Sub. I assemble cold meat sandwiches, hot meat sandwiches, grilled sandwiches and salads. During training, I get paid minimum wage, which is like $7 something an hour. Then after training I'll be all alone in the store. No back person or anything, just ME.

Heeeeeee. I don't mind, I just wanna get lotsa money. Cause I'm a pimpette, and I need the bling.

To my two favourite whores (and best friends), Iskandar and Farah...

HAPPY SIXTEENTH BIRTHDAAAAAAAY(S)!!

ILU both, have a fun birthday, don't spend all my pimpette money on cocaine.

weed is ok.

2005-09-21T15:16:00.000-07:00

Wah kao. I'm so hypocritical I should be slapped.

But like, I can't help it. Looks do have an affect on me

K, there's this guy in my school, I think he's a senior, and his sideview is like DAMNOMFGIWANTYOUTOHAVEMYBABIES. But when you look at him from the front, his eyebrows are too close together. But still, he looks hot.

He saw me staring at him today. 0_0

I want to know his name. He's hooot.

I know nothing about him, and yet, I have a crush on him. It's annoying, because I don't want guys to have a crush on me especially if they know nothing about me. (Like this kid in my art class who's a filipino, and y'all know how it goes with filipino guys and me.) So I want to have a reason to have a crush on him besides his looks, but I'm too shy to say hello. I'm not Stephanie, you know.

But like, damn. I still want to jump on him. Haha.

2005-09-15T16:07:00.000-07:00

Wah. long time no blog.

Want to see my photographic photos? lol

So let me update about my life.

School life? Doing ok. Very mediocre, wasn't as engrossed as I was in studies last year as I am now. I'm trying though, but my subjects don't require much thinking...except for English. I'll try to do better last year though. I'm having the hardest time with Computer Arts because my teacher treats the assignments like it's a business, so I have to put in a lot of effort in it. I can't give anything more than my 100%. It's surprising, because I always thought it would be the easiest.

Love life? Non-existant. The thing with me and guys is...there isn't any guy. Like after the previous relationship, I haven't had a real crush ever since. OMG thomas kim. bahaha. Yeah. but that's because he's korean. and tall.

Family life? Me and my mom always butt head to heads when it comes to financial issues. Me? I always need money (art classes aren't cheap), and she doesn't approve that I'm wasting so much money on nonsensical stuff like pencil sets and brushes and what not. Other than that, we're cool.

Musical life? Duuude..we have so many songs to try out, yet nobody has had the initiative to start jamming.

Friends? Er...my friends over the summer and I have drifted away, but like, it's not that bad. Haha. I miss my Yan Shan and my Farah though.

Art? From japanese style, to western style, to realistic drawing, I am now entering the world of emotional/gothic/gore drawing. Jesus christ...*breathes*

Fashion? I'm brooooke. I bought a $10 tee though so BAHAHA. And 3 belts for $10...and some accessories from the thrift store. Yah. Fuck you, I'm cheap. (Yet I still look hella good.) I'm going to dye my hair black-blue, bitches!!! (or red, depends which one's cheaper.)

So, how's your life?

2005-09-06T13:22:00.000-07:00

Hey Farah....MIKEY WAY IS MINE...BACK OFF!

still love you though. Hee.

Hey new pic! Friend photoshopped for me. What say you? (not picking my nose, yeah)

clickety!

2005-08-21T20:33:00.000-07:00

Met someone today.

EEEEP!

XD

He's hot, aye.

Eh. Don't judge a book by its cover. He's alright, but totally not my type at all.

2005-08-15T22:23:00.000-07:00

You know who I dont' hear a lot about?

Joyce.

I haven't heard a thing about Joyce since I left. I miss Joyce. How is Joyce doing? What class is Joyce in? How is she?

Hahaha...

Farah, dear, what did you get for your Malay O's?

2005-08-11T23:53:00.000-07:00

"You've got us here waiting for you."

"We won't forget you."

"You're always welcome here."

Really?

People forget so easily. Two years has passed, and many more will come and go, and we will be less in touch with each other. Soon you won't even talk to me, you won't remember me. You'll say you won't but i can't help feeling that it's inevitable.

And the worst part is? I might become like that too.

Next year everyone will be separated. Next year everyone will start to forget.

=(

2005-08-09T12:27:00.000-07:00

=O

Sooo. I went to see how much the air fare is from Toronto to Singapore.

Cost : $5,575.00
Tax : $195.98
Total: $5,770.98

That's Canadian dollars.

How can I come up with $5,770.98 in two years all by myself if I can't even save a coupla bucks for a week? I might ask my parents to help me take care of half the cost, but that's just the plane ticket. Everyone needs money to spend when they're on vacation.

So like basically I'm fucked. I won't be able to go back after high school because I can't afford it. Plus I need money to pay for college so fuck that.

I'll just have to return in 2011. Six years from now. Ugh. Stupid money problems.

I guess i'll just have to buy lottery tickets and hope I win or something. Lol.

2005-08-06T16:55:00.000-07:00

K. Hm. OK.

So like, I lost him, you know, and truth be told I expected it. I may be ambitious, but I'm certainly not stupid. I knew it would come sooner or later.

I just didn't expect it to be this sudden...it jumped from right behind that dust bin and kinda jumped on me. (hm..sounds like the squirrel I came across once.)

That day when I spoke to him, I could tell that it was the last time I'll ever talk to him again. And it hurts. Not because I lost a lover. No--to hell with that. I'll get over it soon because I've done it before. Haha look I'm over it already.

It just hurts because I feel like I lost my best friend.

And if he says he doesn't feel the same, well, I'll be damned.

I still consider him a friend, even though he might not consider me one. So like if he needs to ever take a dump in my bathroom, I won't tell him to piss (lol) off like a jealous ex girlfriend. I'll probably say, "Don't you dare stink up my bathroom, bitch."

Because I'm cooler than you and you know it.

2005-08-04T11:26:00.000-07:00

to Farah:

if you free msg me on msn yah?

2005-08-03T19:41:00.000-07:00

Tag Replies:

KAREN: I know studying in Singapore is like stress overload. MOE's mission is probably to work us to death, but I like it better than not learning anything here.

FARAH: I want come back soooo bad it actually causes physical pain. Ouch. I need you guys too omg. The first thing I do when I come back to Singapore is hang with you and my girls because there isn't any better set of girlfriends like you dorks in the world.

*sigh*

2005-08-01T10:09:00.000-07:00

My father wants to go back to Singapore.

But we can't.

We have too much shit going on here.

My grandparents are here.

My parents have stable jobs and are needed.

My brother is graduating soon.

So is my sister (from elementary).

My funeral will be held here.

Everytime I look at my dad, I realise he made a huge mistake. He didn't want to come here. He never did. The thought of us having an unknown choice makes me want to slit my wrists.

But like what's the fucking point? I've been dead for almost two years now. I died the day I got on that plane. =(

2005-07-28T23:56:00.000-07:00

Is that cool or what?
Nope, not contacts, it's just photoshopped.

2005-07-23T17:05:00.000-07:00

I've been just asked to join an all-girl rock band.

Girl with the guitars? (Gee) Girl.
Girl with the bass? (Sarah) Girl.
Girl with the drums? (Jen) Girl.
Girl with the voice? (Me) Girl.

WAHAHA..fun. Don't worry, farah, i'll still joing your band. And I won't steal our name. ;)

2005-07-15T09:54:00.000-07:00

Hey Farah? I'm not only an emowhore (haha...-_-), i'm a cam-whore too!

click
cause
they're
large

(for my blog, at least)

dunno lah, i got bored. haha.

2005-07-09T08:29:00.000-07:00

Right.

So i've heard you guys have a grad night the day after my birthday.

mmm...

You know something?

Life is evil.

2005-07-02T09:00:00.000-07:00

HOLY COW!!!!

2005-07-01T08:18:00.000-07:00

i hope that looks ok, i had a lot of trouble finding the brush for this, i lost it so i had to replace the coulour. it looks kinda ghastly but that's the best i could do...i hope its ok..^^

2005-06-28T17:56:00.000-07:00

I'm in a very angsty mood today.

Nostalgic, even.

I miss Singapore a whole lot. All of it. I even miss my french lessons. I miss grooming checks, I miss those ridiculous punishments, detentions and embarassing visits to the principal's office. I miss Kranji, I miss going by myself to MOELC, going home with Adeline or Hags, or whoever I'm stuck with. I miss not being able to answer a question Mme Lee asks. Like dude, I'm not french.

I miss the canteen, the classrooms, the field. Eh, wait, i don't miss the field. I hate sports. I hate running.

I miss my friends.

I miss my lovers.

I miss my ex lover.

Damn.

*steers away*

I miss Yan Shan!
and Sham!
and Farah!
and Cherilyn!
and the whole gang!

I miss speaking singlish. I miss saying "OMFG STOP SPEAKING CHINESE!". I miss hearing ridicuolous pronounciation. I miss chinese boys. I miss malay boys. I miss indian boys. (same goes for the girls lah). I MISS THOSE LAME ASS SHOWS ON CHANNEL FIVE FOR FUCK'S SAKES!

i miss the heat. i miss my uniform. i have no idea where it went.

I just miss everything.

I miss you.

I really really want to go home, because home is where the heart is... you have my heart.

2005-06-27T17:26:00.000-07:00

for Karen, because I have no idea what to put. Simplicity is beauty, don't you think?

(unfortunately i have no idea how to animate this...*shrug* hope this is ok)

Oh, by the way, WTF THE PARTY'S ON TOMORROWWWWW.

2005-06-25T16:00:00.000-07:00

Watching the days burning out like a cigarette,
Just a few drags to go.
You built me up
And you broke me down,
Somehow.

Everything just seemed so clear to me
Nothing left to know.
I'll love you right and I'll love you pure,
Right now.

How can you say,
That it's too late
To save us now

And I would wait for you, ooh
If you would wait for me, yeah.
I will wait for you, ooh
if you will wait for me, yeah.

Intoxicated the edge is serrated,
So easily torn from the core.
I blushed the first time,
But you blushed the last time
My eyes hit your mind
Regenerated these feelings of hatred,
I long for your love evermore
You built me up and you broke me down
This time.

And I would wait for you, ooh
If you would wait for me, yeah.
I will wait for you, ooh
if you will wait for me, yeah.

How can you say,
That its too late
To save us now?
(How can you say)

wah seh, this song sends chills up my spine. =) yay yellowcard.

2005-06-24T19:18:00.000-07:00

NAKIKILIG AKO SAYO!!!

tol, na in-lab ako ulit tuloy.

=)

in lab ako in lab ako in lab ako!!!!!!!!!

SHIEEEET.

ikaw, may minamahal ka din ba?

2005-06-22T06:47:00.000-07:00

Shit, I turned in my resume to Sunrise Records yesterday. OMFG I WANT THAT JOB SO BADLY.

Anyway, in response to Farah's Nightmare Week, I will list the veddy veddy vierd dreams i had this week too...coincidence that we both have nightmares on the same week?

Last night:
Was planning a friend's surprise birthday party. The cooking went horribly. My dad to the rescue. But my sister stabbed me in the eye with the knife. WTF.

Moral of the story: Don't cook with disgruntled sisters who are carrying knives.

Night before last night:
I went to my friend's house, who invited over some fat white emo chicks who appeared cool at first, but stole my chucks in the end. I had to smash her head with a beer bottle to get back my chucks.

Moral of the story: Never take your Chucks off.

Night before the night before last night:
I was locked in this super rad but weird maze/house in Indonesia(don't ask) with this other hot dude. My objective was to find a way out or else something's gonna kill me. So I run, look for sticks and weapons to throw out the window. Then I finally found a glass door (only in my imagination will someone make a glass door) when I forgot my hot companion. So I look for him, and we both try to smash the glass door down. Nothing happens. So I notice a lock on the thing, put my locker combination in and tadaaa...it worked. We step out of the door but lo and behold, we fall 30 feet down into a forest and kill ourselves.

Moral of the story: Look out of the glass door before walking through it. Stop fooling around with your locker combination. Stop thinking that you're a super hot spy.

YEAH DREAMS ARE RAD!!!!

2005-06-19T11:56:00.000-07:00

You and me
We used to be together
Everyday together always
I really feel
That I'm losing my best friend
I can't believe
This could be the end
It looks as though you're letting go
And if it's real
Well I don't want to know

Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me cause it hurts
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me cause it hurts

Old school No Doubt? Is cooler than you.

2005-06-18T08:52:00.000-07:00

AAAAAAAAAAH

I need a job, a boyfriend, a life.

I'm going to Eglinton Square on monday after my exam and see whether Sunrise has an opening. Sunrise is where I get most of my CDs. Hopefully they do because I'd love to work in a record store. If not, I'll as Lewiscrafts, because art shops are fun. If they don't, then I'll probably take that Harveys job.

K, my job hunting has commenced!

The stores that I want to work in, in order of my preferences

-Sunrise
-Staples
-Grand and Toy
-LewisCraft
-KFC
-Dominion
-Coles--omfg
-Harveys
-any other fast food shit there is.

A CD store is so ME though, i hope they have an opening. =/

2005-06-07T17:35:00.000-07:00

click me, faggots

HAHAHAH!!

I HAVE PHOTOSHOP AGAINNNNNN!!!!

(yes, ma'am, i made that.)

2005-06-06T13:50:00.000-07:00

Everyone's breaking up with everyone nowadays. They're preparing to be single for the summer. It's a fling thing.

It's heartbreak season. Be prepared.

First-Aid Kit for Heartbreaks
-ice cream. it's fucking tradition. don't ruin it.
-a spoon. for the ice cream. the broken-hearted aren't usually up for cones.
-tissue paper. LOTS of it. (bring them to a tissue factory, if possible)
-french fries. always a good touch. (especially if I'm around. ^^)
-a safe. to put all sharp things in. don't let your "emo" friends get hold of them, it's not pretty.
-a pillow/cushion/teddy bear. something stuffed to muffle wails and screams into. they're also great for throwing. They don't hurt when they hit you, as opposed to, say, a glass vase.
-a heavy metal/screamo CD. Turn it up loud, sing to it. just remember, no EMO CD's...they fuck the broken-hearted even more.
-A "Baby One More Time..." CD. If you don't know the lyrics to it, you've been living under a rock for the past five years. It's a guilty pleasure, and the broken-hearted needs all the pleasures the can get.
-a shoulder to cry on. But don't wear your best shirt. Snot and boogers are disgusting. (leave them alone when they get disgusting, too!)

Places You Should Avoid After a Breakup.
-cinemas. The make-out theater isn't exactly where you'd like to spend your time getting over someone.
-cafes. coffee and couples then to go hand in hand.
-parks. period.
-where you and your ex hung out in when you were going out.
-OUT. period.

Things You Should Do After a Breakup
-cause a scene. someone would greatly appreciate it. (*points to self*)
-throw things. it spices up the situation! (again, i would greatly appreciate it)
-exaggerate to your friends about your ex's faults. (this is going to be a great show!)
-get drunk. because hysterical people are hilarious when they're drunk.
-look for another hot mate to drool over and shoot.

However, the most important thing is...
you always have the right to slap your friend silly if he/she gets hysterical. it's not pretty, BUT GOD DAMMIT WOULD YOU GET OVER IT ALREADY?!?!!?

Cheers,
Kay.

2005-06-03T12:46:00.000-07:00

Guess who I saw again playing at my school?

That's right, it's that band again, After Her.

I met Mitch again, who's still as hot as ever. He remembered me which is AWESOME!! He sold me a tee shirt. Then he got the other guys from the band to sign it too. I got to talk to Jason, the guy who looked like Hannah's ex, and he was rad. He signed the white bird on my tee and dubbed it the "J-bird".

Throughout their performance, I could see Mitch looking at me...XD. Yay.

Dude, guys in bands are so hot.

2005-06-02T14:47:00.000-07:00

I met the hottest guy on the bus today.

He's hot. Head to toe gorgeous. He's got light brown hair that covers his eyes and ears. Kinda wavy. Bright grey (i think?) eyes, very very handsome smile. Tall, yay, and dresses grungily.

I saw him on the bus on the way to school. There was eye contact, which was so cool because he is HAWT HAWT HAWT. Totally my type (as far as looks goes).

Then on my way home, I saw him waiting at the bus stop. Hee. He was looking at me. Annnnnd he allowed me to get on the bus first. XD Unfortunately, I did not talk to him, because everybody knows I'm not that kinda girl who asks your number while you're walking down the street singing doo-a-dee-dee-dee-dee-dum-dee-dee-doo...(sorry, couldn't help it.) unless it's a dare. hehe

yay. hope to see more of him. =)

2005-05-27T13:18:00.000-07:00

Shamita thought i was a druggie.

*stares*

I guess it isn't entirely impossible, seeing as Shamita sort of believed that I was. What a crazy rumour! But really, I wouldn't mind being labelled as a drug addict in Kranji because I don't give a fuck, and it's not like I'm going to return to that bastard school anyway. (I mean that in the nicest of ways.) Really, Peter, when I say, "Dude, I'm on crack!" that just means I'm hyper, not literally on crack.

Mhiren dropped out of school. No idea if she's coming back or not. Well, I suppose it's for the best, seeing as there are only 14 days left of school. Then it's summer vacation, then I'll be off to summer school, summer jobs, summer flings and summer-lovin' fun. Oh. And summer cocaine. Woot.

But I can't believe she didn't tell me! Oh well. She's not gonna get a single credit anyway. =/Might as well stay home.

Oh, and hey, my brother's got a hot date today!

....

*stares*

Ahem. Yeah.

I don't know if I should believe that or not. But....

LMFAO.

If he manages to charm the hell out of this girl, then yay. Because charm, my friend, runs in my family's blood. (too bad I haven't got anyone to charm the hell out of!)

XD

*mwah mwah*

2005-05-25T08:06:00.000-07:00

Words are flowing out like endless rain into a paper cup,

They slither while they pass, they slip away across the universe

Pools of sorrow, waves of joy are drifting through my opened mind,

Possessing and caressing me.

Jai guru de va om

Nothing’s gonna change my world.

Any guesses what song's stuck in my head? Haha.

Happy, finally. Yay.

2005-05-22T14:43:00.000-07:00

Mine. All mine.

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

Oh, and if you've got songs to recommend (hopefully in the rock/indie/emo/screamo part of mu-sak), do tell me. So far I've got 9 songs out of my 120 space...lol

2005-05-21T11:33:00.000-07:00

Happy today lah.

1. Getting an mp3 player
2. eating pizza for lunch
3. talking to great friends
4. knowing one of my friends is gonna be ok
5. it's a sunny day
6. my period is over
7. long weekend ahead
8. i'm feeling special

If you're happy, i'm happy that you're happy. If you're not, i'll find ways to make you happy. =)

SCREW THAT. Mid-day, someone just had to fuck up my day

we didn't even go get my stupid fucking mp3 player.

2005-05-19T16:46:00.000-07:00

Why is it that you guys are friends with me, the emotional human water balloon.

I cried again today, for stupid reasons.

GAAAAAAAAAAAH.

2005-05-16T07:52:00.000-07:00

So this guy comes up to me and asks, "Does every emo kid listen to Weezer?"

Lol.

Ok, ok, I'm fine now. Past few days were moody and unhappy and depressing because of PMS+annoyance (of Jan, mostly)+deprivation of music. My cd player? Busted. My Mp3 player? NON EXISTANT. What to do but bitch bitch bitch?

Hello to my luvvahs, Farah and Karen. Thanks for the advice though, Karen. =)

AND to Iskandar: Update your blog, bitch. XD

Hyaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

2005-05-13T07:38:00.000-07:00

Hey poser?

Shut the fuck up.

2005-05-12T08:10:00.000-07:00

= (

I'm not happy.

2005-05-05T13:55:00.000-07:00

I think Jan likes me.

Which is bad, because I REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY don't.

why?
1. immature as hell
2. he dresses like one of those hip hop idiots.
3. tries to hard to be a rocker
4. i don't understand what he's saying half the time (he sounds like a FOB)
5. tries too hard to get someone to be his girl
6. he isn't that good looking
8. he listens to poser songs
9. tries too hard to compliment people
10. i think in reality, he's a poser.
11. asks me all the time, "Are you ok?" Seriously, do i look THAT bad?

(i can list more bad things than good. that's how uncompatible we really are)

and besides, i don't date filipino guys unless i really really really really like them. which never happens.

Also, I can't look at other guys right now. I'm exhausted from thinking about it. It's really uneccessary in my life right now. *sigh* I dunno. I reckon it's because you're so hard to get over. Rizz asked me today, "So you still like him?"

I didn't say anything. She told me sometimes it's like that. It can take more than ten years to get over a person, so don't rush it. (She know's what she's talking about, considering she still loves her first love...they broke up like two years ago.)

I'm swearing off men. GAH.

2005-05-03T18:15:00.000-07:00

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH.

Oh my got I broke a nail.

Finally! Something interesting that happened!

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH.

2005-05-02T16:38:00.000-07:00

I've basically had the worst afternoon this year. First off, my mum last night was having PMS, so that meant she bitched and bitched and bitched. So me, being the nice daughter and everything, decided to prevent any more bitchings by telling the siblings to clean up their shit. And when they did, they started making fun of me, imitating me, laughing at me, rolling their eyes at me. I got so pissed that I screamed at them, "PUTANG INA WALA KAYONG KWENTA! KAYA PALA NAGAGALIT SI MA KASI YUNG UGALI NYO!" (which basically means "Son of a bitch, you guys have no use! That's why ma's always angry because of your attitude)

They still mocked me so i just ran up to my room and slammed the door and cried my eyes out. Then after a few moments i decided to do my homework when I realised that my bag was dirty as fuck (muddy as hell) and I was out of paper. So I tossed the bag aside, wore back my uniform and went to the Zellers. I was still angry at my siblings so I frickin' slammed everything on my way out. I reckon they thought I was running away or something. Lol.

But when I get outside, guess what happens? Ice pellets come crashing down. Ice pellets hurt like FUCK, and I was in the middle of one really windy street. At that point I was ready to turn back, but I didn't want to because I'd see my siblings. So I went. I looked worse than I did when I was in the house because the rain caused my eyeliner to smudge. Worse part was I saw my classmates in Zellers. Gah...

To make matters worse, I couldn't find a decent looking bag, so I bought a beach bag instead...I forgot that my mum isn't too favourable on my splurging. I also bought paper, but that's not important. Oh, and I also saw Goblet of Fire, but I didn't buy it because it was the adult version and I wanted the children's edition Bloomsbury one. BLARGH. I kinda regret buying the bag, but what the fuck, i'll just use it.

Basically I had a bad afternoon because my family sucks ass. Which means I'm soooo gonna get a motherfucking job just to get out of this motherfucking house so that I don't need to see my fucking family.

We're all so dysfunctional, the criminals are the ones rewarded, the good guys get the punishment.

And me? I get death row.

2005-04-30T11:52:00.000-07:00

I went to Eglinton Square with Lynn and Jay yesterday and had a blast. I bought inking pens, a locker mirror to replace my lost one, a new pencil, eraser, a black tee, a bookmark and of course, The Notebook, the book. It's very very sad, I read it all last night, and I cried on most occassions. I'm most likely going to rent the DVD, but I don't wanna watch it alone, cause I'm sure it'll make me feel lonely. Therefore I'm going to look for buddies who'd like to see Ryan Gosling's sweet ass on the screen. Woot.

*sigh*

That book makes me want to look for my own Noah.

I know what it feels like to be night and day.
Always together, forever apart.

2005-04-29T08:24:00.000-07:00

Hey, you, what do you miss?
I?
I miss being in love with you.

(uh, just something that popped in my head. =} I'm not in love with anyone. I just miss being in love.)

2005-04-26T13:03:00.000-07:00

feeling: determined
listening to: MCR, Hang 'Em High

FARAHFARAHFARAH your tagboard! I think i spoilt it! Lol! I was typing some stuff, then i send, then goign to type some more, then realise your tagboard dissappeared! *gasp* Sorry!

K, I write here lah, so you'll be able to see it.

Your heart will mend in time, if cannot, use Kay-Glue. I'm sure you weren't naive or anything, you probably just got led on. Grr. Boys suck. Heh. Feel better soon though, okie? *hugs*

Anyway, YOU WANNA KNOW SOMETHING WEIRD?!?! I had a dream that I went back to singapore also! Except I talk to Yan Shan and some dude *cough*. Yeah. And I did stay...i think. I probably might come back for vacation in, say, summer 2007? That's right after my senior year, before university, so most likely my parents will allow me to go. Hee! (I know, 2007 still very long lah.)

I update more on my very boring day later. It seems I have to finish my religion project. Boo. Not fun.

So give me all your poison
And give me all your pills
And give me all your hopeless hearts
And make me ill
You're running after something
That you'll never kill
If this is what you want
Then fire at will

BlardeeBlar

2005-04-25T15:33:00.000-07:00

feeling: talkative
listening to: My Chemical Romance--To The End

Hey. Yeah. Back to blog. Blogging in general is addictive. I'm an addict. Boo.

102.1 The Edge's planning the raddest event ever this summer. I think it's called EdgeFest '05, but whatever. Some of North America's indie (or not, but still great?) bands are gonna play like Billy Talent, Coheed and Cambria, Story of The Year, Alexisonfire, Rise Against, Kill Radio, Boy, Social Code, The Junction, Out of Your Mouth, The Waking Eyes, Dead Letter Department, just to name a few. I wanna go so bad, but tickets are from $25-$45 and if you know me, you should know by now that I'm always flat-out broke. Woot.

(letting out the dork side of me, Harry Potter 6 is coming out this summer too, and Alanis Morissette's releasing her acoustic Jagged Little Pill--omg i love!--CD, and i need to get new stuff for the dreaded summer school, so, yeah, i'm so gonna be broke. Woot.)

Yay Jan cut his hair. I don't know what happened to his plans of having the emo/mohawk (emohawk?) hairdo. He looks a lot like Paulo's friend now, whatever his name is. He looks like a decent filipino boy, which is weird. Eee. I look sloppy compaired to him. (and wtf he keeps grabbing my MCR cd eh?)

I think I might ask Richel to help me bleach my hair. Er, not all of it, just the underside, so that you won't see the roots. Like Avril's hair, except the lighter part is at the bottom and the black is on top. I wonder if my parents would allow that. I'm sure they will. If they don't....well boo fucking hoo. Anyway, it's not going to be blonde underneath...I'm thinking pink? Red? Orange? Do all three?

I don't wanna end up looking like a damn Harajuku girl though. (A real one, not those bloody fakers Gwen carries around.)

Anyway, FARAH, (your name so big again), I don't know what happened to you--you never tell me, mah--but I really hope you feel better. I've a feeling it's about a guy, and if it is, FUCK HIM (though i'm sure he was pretty nice) . You don't need him, you have me, right? ;) Cheer up girl, you're too pretty to be frowning.

(oh look a new thingimajig)

2005-04-24T13:39:00.000-07:00

NEW LAYOUT! (obviously)

oh, and...

NEW LAYOUT! (livejournal)

Hee.

Jan(my guitarist, bitch, best guy friend) wants to jam with the band this weekend but I can't. First, i'm sick. That means I can't muster up enough energy to get out of the house to go to i-don't-know-where and sing. Second, I don't even know if I want to go, because I hate the bassist. He's always so depressed, he always laughs at my misfortunes and rejects my help whenever I offer it. What a bastard. And third, I haven't memorised the lyrics that I'm supposed to sing yet. And plus, I need to iron my brother's and my uniform. Oh, poop.

Bought My Chemical Romance's Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge CD yesterday. It's kinda...meh...you know what I mean? The lyrics are sort of confusing, there's very little rhythm and three songs sound a like. But I like some of the songs, soooo...but I'd suggest you download the mp3 than buy the CD (although it's cheaper than most cds. $10.99!).

Anyway, I was watching TV today when I flipped the channel to the new Pope's first sunday mass. Then at the bottom of the screen, random facts about him were rolling out. And then I saw "Pope Benedict XVI believes that rock and roll music is the vehicle to anti-religion."

Kiedoke.

'Nuff said. I don't like him.

2005-04-23T16:33:00.000-07:00

I heard news about Miss Lim and Miss Fazlin, who both might migrate somewhere else? Why, is it a trend or something? but best wishes to both of them! I sorely miss the way you guys pushed me and scolded me and helped me in any way possible during my days as an amateur actor in ELDDS. I also miss the way Miss Fazlin lashed out sarcastic remarks every three seconds in History class. Hopefully you guys will find your happiness in the places you migrate too.

*sob*

That makes me think of my old Kranji friends now. The gang, Yan Shan (bird nest mountaaaaiiin), Sham, Cherilyn(cherry), Jerilyn,Debbie (Doobie), Joyce, Xue Yi (tree!), Veronica(belonica, belon, veron), Koon Chin, and that crazy girl, Farah. What'll happen to you guys? I realise this is your last year in Kranji, too, which is bittersweet because a.) you'll finally get the hell out of that communist school (lol) but b.) you'll miss your friends like fuck.
Also, to those other not-so-small people, lincoln (WAHAHAHA SO HANDSOME ARH YOU!! must admit that nobody here's as handsome as you, arh? ;D), kelvin, paul, eric, jun qin, soon hwee, gideon, sani, asmin, iskandar, harith and thye chuan. and to my other friends in other levels. All the best to you people.

Just wanted to say that, before the craziness of the O's start. I guess, you could say, this year is the year of change. =)

Woot, lamers unite.

2005-04-18T16:29:00.000-07:00

FARAH,

I want to hear the story you're dying to tell me. I know you can't keep it in any longer, lol. You can't say on my tagboard email me lah!! I'm also dying to know! =)

Anyway, my art class has turned to a new chapter, painting. I hate painting, and my teacher makes it even worse by saying we're doing abstract painting.

WHAT?!

I don't know shit about abstract, so i'm just going to wing it, I said. And she makes it even harder, saying "We're going to do a good contrast of abstract and figurative motifs."

WHAT?!

"Two contrasting themes, like life and death, love and hate, and then an abstract background. This will give you a chance to practice your painting skills."

WHAT PAINTING SKILLS, WOMAN? WE HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED ON PAINTING PROPERLY!!

"Just think of a theme, and we'll go from there."

Well that's just great. Everyone else took the good ones. Heaven and hell, love and hate, peace and war, blah blah blah.

At least Jay-man gave me an idea. Symbolism. Fire and water. (i was like, "hey! my lj username!") But how can you piece that together? So instead, I'll paint, probably, a phoenix and a raven. To represent ressurection, and death.

What do you think? Insightful?

blah. If only i put this much thought onto my other subjects. LOL.

(yeah, this is pretty much the only interesting thing in my life. lol)

hee.

2005-04-12T04:52:00.000-07:00

Okay, so i haven't fallen off the face of the earth yet.

I've just been lazy/busy/sick the past few weeks. I haven't really had time to update about anything.

In this case, anything=nothing.

Boo.

On the other hand...meh...still nothing.

Oh, wait, me and my ex-band has reunited....except we kicked off the bassist cause he's an ASS. (He's the reason why i left anyway). Woot woot. We're going to play in next year's band aide and acoustica....hey i even know one (or two) of the songs that we're going to play. Sunday Morning by No Doubt and some Korn song. Woot. (And possibly the Strokes. THE STROKES!!)

HEARTS, KAY!

huzzah!!

2005-04-01T08:16:00.000-08:00

Hey, haven't updated in a while.

Okiedoke, let's see what happened these past few days.

x Caught a cold. Boo.

X Went to Band Aide/Battle of the Bands. Awesome show. I got to talk to one of the professional bands, After Her. (Got to talk to Mitch. Hottie!)

x Nothing else.

Well, isn't my life exciting? =)

Pictures

2005-03-27T19:46:00.000-08:00

Hey look I found old pictures!! Oh my god we all looked so young. How time flies, no?

My two best friends, Yan Shan and Shamita.

Farah, Joyce, Cherilyn and Eric, playing truth or dare.

Joyce, Shamita, Me (with short hair omg), Debbie (notice the wet underwear..someone threw her in the pool) and Jerilyn.

OMFG IT'S LINCOLN!!11!1!!1! I <3 this dude.

The whole class....miss them.

Me with short hair again! And my bff, Yan Shan.

Cherilyn, Joyce, Xue Yi, Farah, Me and Shamita.

Same thing except Shimmie ain't there.

The two whores again. lol.

Farah: OMGWTF?!

Me, Xue Yi and the boys.

My favourite picture, Debs lounging around!!

*grins* How I miss you guys. =)

sfdsd

2005-03-24T17:34:00.000-08:00

School was okay. Boring but okay. We watched Forrest Gump in religion. I love Forrest Gump. =) Bought my tickets for Band Aide, and I managed to get the whole crew to get them too. All because we wanted to drool over Paulo. Hahahaha, score!!

When I was walking home today, I saw something black fade into a tree. I've heard a lot of stories saying that trees have within them lost souls or some crap like that. So I was obviously freaked, so I just started praying. I was so scared to walk past that tree, so I just kept praying like the silly little girl I am. I kept chanting, "Dear God, please protect me, I'm scared of ghosts." Hahaha...nothing happened.

I don't know why I started praying. I mean, in normal circumstances, I'd freak out and take the other route. But now, I'm sort of more religious. I always depend on God for something. Like right now, God, I want an Mp3 player. If you could show the light to my parents, they'd probably give in. =) But in all seriousness, I just became more religious because I always feel scared, and talking to God makes me calm.

Crazy and dorky, I know. (I guess all those gospel songs my dad keeps playing on his guitar got to me. lol)

Most of the afternoon I fell asleep listening to my old Blink 182 cd. When I got to "I'm Lost Without You" I damn near threw the CD player at the wall because I remembered someone who always sang that song to me. Crap. Need to keep all reminders of him under keeps or else I'll lose it.

Hohohoho no school tomorrow.....wicked.

<3

2005-03-22T14:28:00.000-08:00

i don't know why i'm laughing at this fat boy.

*looks at picture*

ROFLMFAO!!!!

i'm going straight to hell.

i'm broken hearted.

2005-03-22T13:38:00.000-08:00

so this is how it ends.
opportunities presented;
chances fade like dust.
you left me here drowning in my mistakes

2005-03-21T17:25:00.000-08:00

MY BACK HURTS LIKE A BITCH.

anyway...

you were the best thing i ever had
and i want it back
you were the best thing i ever had
and i want it back once again

(the song weiny and I relate to the most right now. 'tis crazy, even after two months of silence.)

New Chucks.

2005-03-18T12:21:00.000-08:00

Chuck Taylors. Comfortable canvas shoes.
Not too heavy that it suffocates your feet.
Not too light that you feel the bumps when you're walking.
Just right, in its heavenly happy medium.
They're in black too, my favourite colour.
What's so good about these Chucks?
They're mine.

(farah, you jealous or what? XD jkjk)

To do list.

2005-03-16T07:31:00.000-08:00

Wow, i've a lot of things to do today.

~~Iron clothes. whee. fun.~~

Finish homework. more fun.

~~Finish my art homework. This one does have actual fun.~~

Draw three pages of my manga. The publishing date's coming up soon. Jeremy must ink it!

~~Study Dir En Grey's "Mr. Newsman" guitar riffs. Ah, J-Rock. Way cool as well.~~

~~Help Val get her web project done.~~

Go get some groceries.

Get started on driver's ed book. if you're ever in toronto, and you see a mad lunatic driving recklessly, i'm your girl.
~~Get my Chucks. (TODAY!)~~
~~Clean my room.~~

So, all this stuff to do, yet i'm still on my blog. Wow. Note to self, no more procrastinating. You'll get into less shit than usual.

Peace.

2005-03-15T18:00:00.000-08:00

to nameless, once again. but this is the last time i'm going to even bother replying to you.

Hi. You know, I don't really care what you call me. Insult me, my scene, my thighs, sure whatever. But what i'm wondering is how come you had the guts to say all of that, when you don't even have enough courage to put your own motherfucking name on my motherfucking tagboard? Oh, wait, I know this one. See, you're a coward. The worst of its kind.

Now, I'd tell you to get a life, but I doubt you even have the mental capacity of comprehending what getting a life means. No, my dear, it doesn't mean getting on random people's blogs and pissing them off. It means getting your little butt out of the computer chair, going out into the world and making some friends. But with your attitude, i doubt you'll make any. But hey, that's your problem, not mine.

NOW GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY TAGBOARD!
(and farah's too, if you don't mind)

2005-03-14T13:56:00.000-08:00

to farah:

I really can't say what happened. And it's kind of really hard to make it up to Yan Shan and Lincoln what I did wrong, seeing as I'm all the way here in Toronto and you guys are in Singapore. But the good news is she's not mad at all. I don't know about Lincoln though, I haven't spoken to him for days. Which is scary, because we talk daily. If Lincoln and Yan Shan don't speak to each other, it's my fault lah.

Ok, tuning the guitar! =)

Actually you need a tuner, but only for the low E string. Then what you do is put your forefinger on the fifth fret of the low E string. Strum it, and you have the tune for the B string. The E string (with your finger on the fifth fret) and B string should sound the same.

Then put your forefinger on the fifth fret on the B string, and that's the tune for your G.

B string (with finger on 5th fret) and G string should sound the same also.

On the G string, put your finger on the fourth instead of the fifth fret. That would be the tune for the A string.

On the A string, put your finger back on the fifth fret.

A visual aid to help you, because it is really confusing.

hopefully this helped in someway. this is what i usually do when i lose my tuner. which is happens all the time. haha.

to nameless

2005-03-14T11:53:00.000-08:00

To nameless, whoever you are.

Because my picture post bothered you so much, it has been deleted. But of course, you'll probably say, "That doesn't erase the fact that you're still a slut."

Ah, of course not. I still hump men/women/objects 24/7 a day. Even right now, while i'm typing up this entry.

I'll have you know, that I'm pretty sure, that if I ate your mother, I would have fatter thighs than if I ate my own boobs, which is physically impossible. Besides, it is a known fact that I have no boobs. If I did, they would be called grapes-stuck-to-my-chest, instead of the plain old rack.

However, I do thank you for the constructive criticism, and therefore will improve on getting my thighs to be--gasp!omg!--less fat. I'll stop eating mothers, my non-existant boobs, and go on a carb-free diet. I'll also burn my uniform, and go to school in a itchy smock and a potato sack, just to impress you. God knows the Toronto School District Board would probably be impressed too and make that the official uniform for my school.

Hopefully this post made you happy because it served you two purposes. 1.) Proof that I am a slut. 2.) I am fat, and I admit it. And if you are happy, I would appreciate it if you leave my blog alone. I do not know you (hopefully i don't, because that would suck.) and I do not recall doing anything slightly menacing to ruin your day/week/month/year/life, so I hope you would stop tagging on my board and leave me be.

*rolls eyes*

2005-03-12T18:25:00.000-08:00

~~Yan Shan officially~~ ~~hates~~ ~~me.~~

I won't be surprised if Lincoln does too. I'm such an asshole, I should dissappear from the face of the earth, or just walk right into Hell's Gate and crash into Satan head first. I deserve that much.

Don't you just hate it when you betrayed someone so close to you, and you didn't really mean it?

=(

we're cool now.

ah. should've read this somewhere before.

2005-03-11T19:34:00.000-08:00

stolen from mia's xanga.

"You might not be his first, his last, or his only. He has cared about someone else before and possibly will again, but if he cares for you now, then what else matters? He`s not perfect and you aren`t either, and the two of you will never be perfect, but if he can make you laugh at least once, hold onto him & give him the most you can. He is probably not going to quote poetry, he might not be thinking about you every second of the day, but he will give you a part of him that he knows you can break. So don`t hurt him, don't change him & don`t expect more than he can give. Don`t over analyze, smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad, and miss him when he`s not there."

WISH LIST

2005-03-10T14:00:00.000-08:00

Everybody knows i'm a greedy girl. I really am and it's pissing me off. I'm too materialistic, and it's all thanks to the booming growth of consumerism!! And envy. =/ That's a deadly sin. I might be going to hell. XD

GIMMEWHATIWANT

An Mp3 player. Doesn't matter if it's not an iPod. I just want something that plays my mp3s while i'm at school. CDs are too expensive for me. Hahaha.
A distortion pedal/multi-effects pedal. Because my guitar sounds like shit without it.
NEW CHUCKS! (for me and Farah. We have chuckie issues)
Bleach for hair. I'm gonna bleach a chunk of my hair and dye it bright red. =) If my parents won't mind. I doubt they will. (my dad will but my mom wouldn't really care..she'd probably urge me to do so)
plain black tee-shirts. my friend's gonna stencil them for me! but i seriously don't know where to get them.
paint for my room
Happy Bunny posters.
NEW GLASSES GODDAMMIT
brightly coloured eye-shadows.
hairspray
new pants!
and a belt.

Wow aren't I one materialistic person? Hahaha.

SHOUTOUTS (because i'm too lazy to tag you peeps back)
Atiqah: Give me a break, i do look like shit sometimes. Yep.
Farah: Somebody once told me i looked like a mad dog. =( I'm not hot. I'm pretty lukewarm. XD You'r hotter lah!

{sheHEARS|BestOfMe--theStartingLine}

sing me something i won't forget.

2005-03-07T18:07:00.000-08:00

Don't you just hate it when the night before, you couldn't sleep at all till four fucking am in the morning, and when you finally do sleep, you have to wake up three fucking hours later to go to school?

Well, we now all know how my day went.

I think I yawned about, say 23456543 times today. =) Yeah, and about 6789567 people told me I looked like shit. Thanks guys, I appreciate that.

At least I didn't have any homework. But I still have to draw my comic and I have no intentions of finishing the second page before the due date. Fuck that, Steph and Tim don't even have a story yet. My group's the most advanced on in that bloody club!! *angry fist*

Because of my homework-free afternoon, right after I changed out of my uniform, I just hopped into bed and woke up at like seven. Then, being a true blog addict and all, I had to update about it!

Yes, my life is that interesting. XD

Oh, hey, look, i've put music on this damn thing. Dance to it, and you get my official stamp of coolness. Haha.

heh.

2005-03-06T11:23:00.000-08:00

New Layout!

You like?

I'm proud because I did this all by myself.

hee.

sdfd

2005-03-06T09:08:00.000-08:00

I cannot stop procratinating. I seriously CANNOT. It's a bad habit. I have two pages of blank paper, waiting to be drawn into, but I just can't bring myself to draw something. I hate me right now.

My dad pissed me off last night. See, my mom was at work so I had to cook (yes cook, omfg), and, well, I burned myself half the time. And while I was screaming in pain, my dad scolded me for being so loud. I have two burns, on my hand, and on my neck. Luckily they're small. I swear, if it wasnt' for my sister, I would've burnt the house down. So much for me being a good cook. My brother said the french fries were better than my mother's though. Hah.

I think during dinner my dad felt bad for yelling at me because he started talking to me about my math homework. Dude, if you wanna make up a fight with your daughter, MATH is so not the way to go. Bring me a band aid or something and i'll give you more food. Hey at least he said dinner was good though.

My sister's blush powder broke. So me being a creative genius and all (lmfao), I put it into a small container, broke it up even more, and compressed it. Good as new. I rock your socks off. Speaking of make up, I need to get that stupid red eyeshadow. Grr. It's annoying meh, seriously. Also that big black pearl necklace. and white eyeliner. heh.

I'm such a shopping whore.

SHOUTOUTS:

Karen : Yeah I shouted that in front of the whole class. They just laughed, but I really couldn't be bothered about what they thought of it.

Atiqah : Yes, new blog! But i'm still really at livejournal. Also, your blog is really pretty. (coz your face graces it. =] )

Farah : that idiot who stole your chucks deserves to die. Alamak I have to wait for so long to get a new one. =/

that's it i give up

2005-03-04T17:58:00.000-08:00

I can never keep promises for myself anymore. I promised myself, "No, no more irrelevant purchases!" and what do I do this afternoon? Waste $16 dollars on irrelevant things. I bought four notebooks. Three of them I don't even need. I bought red nail polish, I wanted that, yeah, but I didn't really need it. Got some food, even though I brought some. And I bought folders for my sister and me. She needed it. Did I? Fuck no. That's it. My Chucks Money is gone.

Had the Proffesional Learning Community today, and I did absolutely nothing of the studying sort. I did choose my courses for next year though. The rest of the time I was either doodling on my comic, or talking to Jen, Joanne, Meammy, Aleilei, Janna and Rizz. We plan to go out during the March Break at Eaton's Centre. I have no idea how to get there. Toronto's too damn big.

Ahaha I had a bad experience after lunch today. Hahaha, and it's funny how it started out. I was so damn hungry and i forgot to bring my lunch. I opened my bag and there was a sandwich in there, I don't know how it got there, I probably didn't eat it the day before but I didn't give a fuck. I just gobbled up that baby and the next thing you know I was running for the bathroom. But nothing happened, so I just went for Math class. Then my stomach ache came back, and I couldn't concentrate on the lesson. I was so embarrassed, because I really really really wanted to FART. LMFAO. After a few equations I couldn't take it anymore, so I screamed out, "Mr. Ji I have a really really bad stomach ache and if you don't let me go to the bathroom like right now you'd be making a big mistake."

XD

I crack myself up.

Farah ; woman, i miss you too! I had fun talking to you in class earlier. =) I don't know when i'll visit, but expect it to happen in 1 and a half years?

Karen ; secondary student in Singapore having loads of stress? hahaha story of my life. =) Hang in there.

what the fuck. //stupid entry do ignore//

2005-03-03T18:25:00.000-08:00

Why does it always fucking seem like I have no fucking time to do anyfuckingthing anymore?

AND WHY THE FUCK AM I ALWAYS FIVE FUCKING DOLLARS SHORT WHEN BUYING SOMETHING?!?!

Shit, i'm probably $20 short of getting a new pair of chucks. My old ones have turned yellow and are a year old. My mom won't pay for my chucks...she thinks they're too...baduy. (kung naiintindihan mo ibig sabihin pangalan mo'y karen. kung hindi, wtf are you doing reading my blog?)

Gah.

I asked my mom and dad about the photography course that I want to take for 11th grade. That skeptical look washed over their face again, and they said, "You're already taking Visual Art. And Applied Design. And Computer Art! Why photography?"

Because that course is easy. You just click a simple button, and you get a credit. Plus I like saying "Say cheese, motherfucker!" to my subjects. But I guess if they won't let me get that course, I might have to make a grand entrance for the Photography club. And possibly shoplift for a camera....how the fuck can a seventeen year old chick steal a camera without no one noticing? It won't fit in my hole, that's how. XD

these eyes they're strongly covered in disguise
they're waiting on the real time again
you'll see that no one knows for sure

Blog-tastic!

2005-03-01T13:00:00.000-08:00

Interestingly enough, friendster has a blog. Which means i have now...::counts:: three blogs.

::silence::

Does it ever occur to anyone that I write about things that have absolutely no relation to my current life whatsoever? In that case, i have achieved my purpose. To bore oneself into decroded pieces of crap.

Thankyou,thankyouverymuch.

hahahohoheehee...looking for the right tagboard

2005-02-26T09:45:00.000-08:00

So, after changing my template ::thanks korogoshi:: and linking people, i had to look for a tagboard. I signed up for at least ten million tag boards (hardeeharharhar) looking for a good one. That was a nightmare. thank god i found this one, though it doesn't really match the layout. Whatever.

Hey, if you know me, (KATRINA, bitch!) and you have a blog, do link me and i'll give you a cookie. I promise.

<3>

What? First Post

2005-01-31T14:21:00.000-08:00

OMG new blog!

Don't know exactly why I made one. Hee.